Editorials

She Can't Cook. Who Cares?

It has recently come to light that Cindy McCain is a repeat-offender in the recipe stealing department.

On her husband's campaign site, they posted "her" recipes for, among other things, Ahi Tuna with Napa Cabbage Salad, Passion Fruit Mousse, Farfalle with Turkey Sausage, Peas, and Mushrooms, and Rosemary Chicken Breasts and Warm Spinach Salad with Bacon. Turns out, these were all stolen.

In damage control, McCain's campaign fired an intern, and changed the recipes to ones for Lemon Chicken and Beef Stew.

Lemon Chicken and Beef Stew?!!?!? I can make that shit. Anybody can make that shit. Cindy McCain obviously cannot cook for shit. Shit.

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Go Fuck Yourself, Hank.

Let's say you have lung cancer. Hank is your doctor. You pay him a lot of money. You've been seeing him for many months, and things are only getting worse. Finally, Hank has a big announcement for you. Turns out he's been working hard on coming up with a plan. His plan: a radical scheme for reorganizing the tobacco industry, a plan he admits he's been thinking about since before he started treating you and is not even intended to help you.

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The Treasury Dept. today issued a proposal to overhaul the nation's financial regulatory system:

+ "Some may view these recommendations as a response to the circumstances of the day," Mr. Paulson said in a speech Monday at the Treasury Department. "That is not how they are intended."

+ "Secretary Paulson has been working on this package for about a year, so it's not like pulling a rabbit out of a hat," Dana Perino, the White House press secretary, told reporters on Air Force One on Monday.

He's been working on this package for about a year?!?!?! To recap: mortgages unpaid, banks collapsing, dollar declining, shit-hitting-fan all over the place. Paulson all the while has been coming up with a big plan for, basically, less regulation.

BusinessWeek's Michael Mandel said it best:

Let's see. In the middle of perhaps the greatest financial upheaval since the Great Depression, Treasury Secretary Hank Paulson is proposing a change in financial regulations which basically amounts to a big wink to Wall Street. His plan will go nowhere, both for political and practical reasons. In fact, it does not even meet the minimum standard of improving transparency, which would reduce the possibility of a similar crisis in the future.

Here's Paul Krugman in the NY Times:
"Anyone who has worked in a large organization — or, for that matter, reads the comic strip “Dilbert” — is familiar with the “org chart” strategy. To hide their lack of any actual ideas about what to do, managers sometimes make a big show of rearranging the boxes and lines that say who reports to whom."

Finally, former Treasury Secretary Larry Summers in the Wall Street Journal:

"It's probably a bad idea to spend too much time debating the organization of the fire department while the fire is still burning."

To summarize: Go fuck yourself, Hank.

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Wise Beyond His Years

Manny Ramirez on the baseball playoffs, where his Red Sox trail 3-1:

"Why should we panic?" he said Wednesday in a rare clubhouse interview. "We've got a great team."

And then, this: "It doesn't happen, so who cares? There's always next year. It's not like it's the end of the world."

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Mayor Bloomberg Gets A Lift to Express Train, Media Sprints to the "Invetigation" Room

This morning, we learned that the New York Times spent upwards of five weeks
stalking NYC Mayor Michael Bloomberg outside his Upper East Side home in an effort to learn whether he really does in fact take the subway to work every day.

Apparently he doesn't. At least he sort of doesn't. According to the report, the Mayor actually has two large ethanol powered Suburbans idling outside his home, which then drive him past two 6 (local) stations and then drop him off at the 59th Street express.

Editorial: I Will Follow Him, Follow Him Wherever He May Go


Cosmodrome would like to take this chance to fully endorse G. Clooney's recently announced war on Gawker, and to announce our intentions of fully supporting his endeavor with whatever means we may have at our disposal. Gawker, quite frankly, makes us all throw up just a little bit in our mouths, and while we don't mention any names in our grand declaration, our enemies will soon know who they are.

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