The E-Life: April 17-21

Given the fact that I have a day job, as do many of my friends and acquaintances, in a given week, I'll view and receive in my inbox boatloads of links and general wittiness. Some will provide news, others junk, and yet others beautiful bits of information from the e-world.

So for those of you too busy to keep up in world news or in the wonderful things the internet has to offer (or those of you just missing out for one reason or another), here's a survey of what you missed in the last week:

[Editor's note: The information below is meant as entertainment. If you're really too busy to keep up with news that affects you, we can't help.]

April 17

Pigs Playing Sports = Cuteness!
In Russia, they have pig olympics. Among the events are pig-racing, pig-swimming, and pig-(non-US)football.

Oil Men Are Evil, Duh.
In the past year, some places in the United States have started charging $3 for a gallon of gasoline. Last year, Exxon CEO Lee Raymond made $69.7M, and received $400M+ in a retirement bonus. Oh, and by the way - last year, Exxon made the most profit EVER by a corporation. (Read that sentence again and think about the fact that it's true.)

Ironic Crime Labs Issues Sentence
A few years ago, Illinois Governor George Ryan emptied his state's Death Row. Last week, he was convicted on federal corruption charges, leading to up to twenty years in the big house.

It's Still News If You Don't Know About It
In 1921, there were race riots in Tulsa. According to Wikipedia, these happened as the end result of an elevator mishap.

April 18

Capote 2
Despite the success and Oscar nominations of last year's Capote, it seems audiences are craving more of the squeaky-voiced author. Thus, we get Infamous, starring Sandra Bullock as Harper Lee.

I Go to Peru, Just to Canoe
Besides Machu Pichu and some other hot shit, Peru's still totally boss. As The New York Times reported, the Peruvian city La Mar has some serious chillaxing going on in its cafes. (Check the bartender on the right - that's way too much fun for mid-afternoon!)

It's Not Always Relevant to Your Life
For those of you that care, check out what Kuwait Airways is showing for their in-flight entertainment.

Points For Those of You That Know What a Neologism Is
As you might expect, Wikipedia's entry for Simpsons neologisms is pretty absurdly long and involved. This was a Cosmodrome favorite:

In the film Young Jebediah Springfield , which relates the founding of Springfield, the group of pilgrims see a wild buffalo, with one of them proclaiming, "It's some sort of land cow!"

For further Simpsons awesomeness on Wikipedia, go to the pages for Troy McClure and C. Montgomery Burns.

April 19

CJ Resigns, Josh's Duties Reduced
It's been a rough week for White House staffers, as the new Chief of Staff told Press Secretary Scott McClellan to take a walk and for Karl Rove to focus on winning elections.

TomKitten!
According to some published reports, Tom Cruise plans to eat the child's placenta. According to others, this was all a big "joke."

Good, and Good For You
From the archives of Valparaiso University (IN), come these really great maps looking at the religious makup of the United States.

New York Times, Circa 1980
The New York Times has begun (always has been?) running a weekly survey of Russian newspapers.

You Can't Stop Silvio
Despite a court ruling upholding his loss in the recent Italian elections, uber-rich (and now former) Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berulsconi (see right, apparently vexed with the E.U.) refused to concede defeat.

Cats + Lasers + Andy Samberg = Funny
SNL is experiencing an, albeit mild, rebirth - thanks to digital shorts like this one.

April 20

Sophie's Choice
A great quote from Michel Gondry's first major studio flick, Human Nature:

Gabrielle: You must choose. It is like that movie "Sofie's Choice" only it is Nathan's choice. Do you know that movie, "Sofie's Choice"? It is like that. Only it is this.

Kermit Plays Music to Great Effect
This video (scroll down past the nipples people) of not-quite-Muppets playing instruments in some sort of working-overtime setting is simply brilliant.

The Statue of Liberty Stays in One Place on the Map
People on the internet have WAY too much time on their hands: a map outlining all of the destinations from the two Ghostbusters movies.

Click on This If You Want to Get Scared
Have you ever read the business page? If so, have you read it more than once? If so, have you ever noticed that the same guys are on the board of every controlling institution in this country (and the world)? The people at www.theyrule.net have, and they've created this really creepy interactive tool to see the intricacies in the great map of influence.

The Pied Piper of R&B
You (and I) wish you had gone to this R. Kelly show.

Awesome Nintendo Art
That title was a little too self-explanatory, here's the link. (Also, see right.)

April 21

News From Hell
The director of Bend it Like Beckham is set to direct a film version of the TV show "Dallas," starring John Travolta and Jennifer Lopez.

Great Gear...
...is being flashed by the Nepalese riot police. For more on why they're all Jack Bauer-ed out, see here.

There's Pollution Outside of LA and the Third World?
For proof, check out the Midwest Haze Cam.

Riding the Bus in Turkey
Apparently riding the bus in Turkey is a pretty fly way to get around.

Giuliani Gets Into Bed With Ralph Reed
Next month, Rudy Giuliani will headline a fundraiser for the former head of the Christian Coalition, Ralph Reed. He really wants to defy those who say an Italian Jew from New York won't be elected President anytime soon. Ye gads!

And Finally... Divorce, Hollywood B-List Style
Charlie Sheen and Denise Richard's divorce is MESSY. See this:

During one visit, according to Richards, Sheen pulled down a framed wedding photograph, sawed it in half, and scrawled "the dumbest day of my life" across it.

Sheen's response to these complaints: "I deeply regret her response to my request for the court to decide what's best for our children has taken the form of baseless allegations that I deny." Cosmodrome translation of the preceding sentence: "What a crazy bitch."